Parental Guidance Needed

My wife sent me a picture message of my daughter, Muirne (MEER-nah), the other day and I almost burst into tears. Not because it’s a bad picture; quite the opposite, she’s a very cute kid. I was upset by the picture because it makes painfully obvious something about her.

We’ve recently noticed that Muirne’s right eye is lazy. It’s especially pronounced when she’s tired, but it wanders even when she’s awake and alert. I was concerned at first, but I figured a temporary eye patch and maybe glasses would solve the problem. Then someone mentioned to me the possibility that Muirne might need surgery and I kind of lost it.

We have an appointment with an opthalmologist, but it’s not until February. I’m going slowly insane waiting for the next two weeks to go by.

It’s tough to adequately explain how I feel about this. Maybe I’m overreacting, but I hoped my daughter would be… perfect, I guess. Not perfect in the overbearing, you’d-better-have-straight-A’s kind of way, but more that I hoped she wouldn’t have to deal with any difficulties early in life or ones that would be permanent. The thought of my 2-year-old going under the knife terrifies me in a way no horror flick ever could.

Hopefully, it’s a non-issue and in a few years she’ll have no problems with the eye whatsoever. Send out prayers to whatever god you believe in for my little girl, please.

Darius McCaskey Avatar

3 responses to “Parental Guidance Needed”

  1. Mary Diamond Avatar

    I’ll send her good magicks on the next full moon (and in between). In the meantime, though, a few words of comfort…

    My best friend had a lazy eye as a kid. She wears glasses now, and unless she’s been without them for a significant period of time you’d never know. From what little experience I have with the subject it’s usually fixable with vision correction and no surgery at all.

    She’s a beautiful girl, and even if she ends up with four eyes like the rest of us (just about everyone I know!), I’m sure she’ll make it look good.

  2. Mark Lyon Avatar

    If she does need surgery, it’s better to get it now, while she’s young. Nonetheless, I hope the time passes quickly for you and surgery turns out to be unnecessary.
    On the other (rather whimsical) hand, maybe she’s a mutant and this is just evidence of her powers kicking in?

    @Mary – I’ve been noticing a trend where the majority of the most intelligent people I know require some form of vision correction. I wonder if higher IQ increases the chances of visual acuity issues.

    1. Darius McCaskey Avatar

      Yeah Mark, I totally thought of that too! 🙂 Or perhaps she’ll lose her sight but gain superhuman hearing and agility. And then she can get some gay red pleather jumpsuit with tiny little horns on the forehead… Shit, how am I going to afford to put her thru law school!?

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